Thanks an Effing Lot!

Dearest friends and family the world over,

You all deserve ponies, and ice cream sundaes, and bouncy castles, and…I don’t know. What is like, super balls awesome? ATVs? ATVs, I suppose, are pretty fucking rad.

The encouragement I receive in support of my dream is incredible, and incomparable. I’m an author now, not only because I finished a manuscript. I am so loved. If my heart swells any more, blood will leak through the pores of my skin. Literally.

Don’t you hate it when people improperly insert literally into their conversations? “I packed so many egg rolls down my throat, my stomach, like literally exploded.” I was so fucking mortified, I like, died. Literally, dude.” “I rolled my eyes so fucking hard, they literally fell out of my head.” “I’m a vacuous cunt. Literally.”

And I am literally grateful.

You all are bananas, and I love you endlessly.









60 thoughts on “Thanks an Effing Lot!

  1. Totally!! You “literally” nailed it πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰β€οΈ

    Seriously, though, I completely agree!! πŸ‘πŸΌπŸ‘πŸΌπŸ‘πŸΌ. This is one of my (*many*) pet peeves, too. (I’m sort of an ornery owl lol) πŸ˜‰πŸ’™πŸŒŸ

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I literally don’t know what to like, literally say, but I figure that I could figuratively say we love you and are proud of you, like totally. In the most literal sense. Also, all the recs for the usage of vacuous cunt, so very Johnny Rotten of you:)

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I literally peed my pants. Or did I? I was quite excited but I literally haven’t done that since I was… like…5.
    How many words can YOU think of that start with L and end in Y?
    LoveuoY – and thank YOU for this.

    Liked by 2 people

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